Wednesday, November 30, 2016

We are knee deep in decorating Shiloh for Christmas.  It's a lot of work, but very rewarding at the end of the day.  (Or more accurately, the three to four days that it takes to do this large job.)  Some years ago an 8 foot tree was donated to us, complete with lights and ornaments.  It fits perfectly in our dining room.  Like it was made for the spot.  And then a few years later we acquired another, smaller tree, which is put up in the library.  The downstairs tree is topped with an angel, the likes of which we could never afford to buy.  All the decorations on our big tree are more formal.  The overall effect is quite breathtaking.  The five foot tall upstairs tree is the fun tree.  Many of the ornaments were hand made miniature toys from Germany, all of which were given to us.  It's topped with a hand made angel, made by yours truly years and years ago. 

When the trees are set up and the lights are turned on, we move on to all the nativity sets.  We have a total of four sets.  Each one is more breathtaking than the other one.  

Christmas is a special time.  We  truly love this time of the year as we focus on the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Could we talk, she asked.  Her heart was breaking as she poured out the story.  

Ebogo's brother-in-law has put a stop to their romance.  Turns out he was the problem all along.  Does not want Ebogo to marry a girl who is not from his church.  He's the pastor.

Ebogo is devastated.  He's madly in love with our girl.  Never imagined he would be able to find someone so perfect for him.  And yet, in the culture, he cannot go against the will of the family.  He has no choice.  They must part.  The tears are flowing.  Hearts are broken.  Life will never be the same again.  

But God.  The God Whom we serve is still in control.  He can do all things.  If He wants these two people to marry each other, nothing is too hard for Him.  If He knows some reason unknown to them why this would never work, may His will be done.  They are clinging to God, following hard after Him.  Determined to submit to His will, no matter what the outcome. 

Monday, November 28, 2016

The best way to tell about our trip to Bandjoun for Thanksgiving is to start with Rachael's report on the things that happened prior to our arrival.  When she talks about "Thanksgiving guests", that's us.  Rachael is a young school teacher, living with Ellen, a career missionary.  She teaches Ellen's adopted Cameroonian daughter, Doris.

> Rachel's perspective, Nov. 23, 2016:
> What a day! To those of you who prayed for me today, thank you! I would never have imagined when I went to sleep last night all that would happen in the next 24 hours. Yet throughout it we saw that God was in control. I woke up at 5:30 AM to hear Etienne, our guard, and Ellen crying out, Brie (the dog) was dead. Brie was an amazing watch dog. No one would ever come on our property with Brie's fierce bark, yet she never bit anyone. We were always alerted to everything going on. She was truly a good friend that was hard to lose.
> Brie was poisoned. During the night, Etienne heard some noise but looking around our property saw nothing. Someone must have thrown some food over the fence containing poison and Brie, who loved food, ate it. She threw up by Ellen's truck and then laid down and died. The blood coming out of her mouth was a sign she was poisoned. Etienne found her lying there in the early morning. Ellen, Doris, and I all cried. Not only had we lost a friend but we were afraid for our safety. Who would poison a dog but to go for the house next?
> After Brie died, I cried and cried as I had my devotions. God was so good in giving me promises from His Word. "He will never leave us nor forsake us." "When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I." "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." I felt this ache and heaviness in my heart, like how could anything possibly be worse. But it did get worse. Yet God was with us.
> Thankfully Ellen went to the police, which was important as we made their contact for what would happen tonight. Doris and I stayed at home making preparations for Thanksgiving tomorrow. Because of the security issue, Ellen made contact with a Christian dog breeder and veterinarian, Asong, who had a dog already for her--a 7 month old German shepherd. After prayer meeting we brought her home. She is terrified at the present especially after what happened tonight, but we are praying she will make a good watch dog.
> Etienne was coming to work when we arrived home. He helped us unload the dog and went back to get his phone. Thank the Lord he went home. (He lives next door.) His fiance Sheila was tied up by 2 men. These 2 men had been seen by Etienne and another good neighbor Jean Baptist wandering around the neighborhood the previous day. As strangers , they were wondering what they were up to. Well, now we know that these men poisoned Brie, interrogated Sheila as to the whereabouts of the "white woman," and wanted money.
> Poor Etienne and Sheila really "took the beating" for us tonight. In the process of the nightmare of an evening, Sheila escaped and came running to our house, tied with packaging tape. She was so traumatized that she lay on the kitchen floor vomiting into a bucket. Etienne was hit in the mouth and bled much. As many as 20 or 30 neighbors gathered on the street. The police came. The 2 bandits were captured.
> We are staying here tonight with Etienne and Sheila staying with us for protection. Tomorrow we will go back to the police.
> It was a terrifying evening. Yet we still have much to be thankful for. Thankful for missionary and national friends who were praying for us. Thankful that Etienne went home and found Sheila before something worse could have happened to her. Thankful that although Brie is dead, no humans were killed. Thankful for good neighbors who stick together in time of need. Thankful for a new dog that God immediately provided. Thankful for the police and their willingness to come tonight. They are also patrolling the area tonight. Thankful that Doris was staying overnight at another missionary's house and did not have to witness this whole ordeal. That our guests for Thanksgiving had not yet arrived. Thankful that our house is safe.
> Perhaps you wonder reading my list of thank-yous how I can be so calm when so much bad happened today. Well, I have never been so afraid in my life. Yet I must assure myself God is in control. No matter where I am something bad could happen to me. I am only safe because God is watching over me. God gives strength and peace as we're going through a trial. Although I have many unanswered questions I know that God is still God. He won't allow anything to happen to us that is not in His plan.
> We would all appreciate your holding up our house and neighborhood in prayer tonight--for safety, peace, and wisdom. As we all celebrate Thanksgiving tomorrow, we truly have much to be thankful for. I feel like today I lived one of those nightmare stories that happen to missionaries that you read about in books. Yet just as true as the reality of today was, so is the reality that God is with us. In His peace I rest tonight!
> "Above you are God's overshadowing wings,
> Underneath you are His everlasting arms,
> All around you the angel of the Lord encamps to deliver you,
> Inside God's peace that passes all understanding guards your heart and mind."
>

 

Sunday, November 27, 2016

We arrived back at Shiloh just before 4 p.m. today, tired but happy to be back home.  We've taken showers, washed two loads of laundry, eaten a bite, and are now headed off to bed.  

We have several days worth of stories to tell, but are too tired to start in tonight.  So come back around tomorrow (if all goes well on our end) and listen to an amazing saga.

Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Tomorrow morning we will be traveling to the town of Bandjoun to celebrate Thanksgiving with a group of American missionaries.  Our plan had been to travel there today, spend the night, and travel on to Bambili with them tomorrow, to link up with even more missionaries.  We were to have been around 30.  But plans change, Plan B comes into play, and life moves forward.   Now we will only be 14 at our Thanksgiving table. 

Why did plans change you ask?  Good question.  We invite you to do a Google search of "Bamenda" and see for yourself what is going on in the area we are no longer traveling to.  Civil unrest has broken out in the English Regions of Cameroon.  It was to have been a three day peaceful strike.  By afternoon of day one, young people began spilling out into the streets and things were anything but peaceful.  

We do not know what the future holds, but we do know the One Who holds our future.  And we rest secure in Him.

Monday, November 21, 2016

She was subdued when she came to work this morning.  We headed straight to the office where her story spilled out.  It seems that her time with Ebogo's family on Saturday did not go as hoped or planned.  Everyone was nice enough.  Pleasant and friendly.  They treated Doris with kindness.  But then the meeting began and very quickly Ebogo's mother brought everything to a grinding halt.   Her concern stems from the fact that Doris's father (the sperm donor) is from the same tribe as her people.  Even the same village if I understand things correctly.  

This was certainly not news to any of us.  Guy had done the work, ferreting out the facts on the ancestry of this invisible man who impregnated Doris's 16 year old mother and then disappeared.  He openly disclosed all of this to Ebogo three weeks ago when we met him.  They were both satisfied that there was no relationship between he and Doris.

But his mother is not satisfied.  She says that Ebogo is young (29 years old) and does not know the family tree as she does.  Her great-grandfather had 78 wives.  Yes, you read that correctly.  That's seventy-eight wives.  (And you think you have problems with just one!)  She is concerned that Doris's father could show up somewhere in the descendants of all those wives.  And if he does, four generations later, there will be no marriage for this young couple.

So let's do the math here.  Back in the day when Ebogo's Great-great-Grandfather was marrying all those gals, the goal was for each wife to produce at least ten kids.  And most of them were successful.  We know a 75 year old wife who produced 14 babies.  Even as recently as 25 years ago when we arrived in Cameroon, every man did everything he could to have at least ten children.  So it is not an exaggeration to imagine that this great-great might have fathered 780 children.   And the next generation would also have done all to have ten children each, which brings us to a nice round 7,800.  We need to multiply by ten for one more generation which makes 78,000.  We have just arrived at Ebogo's mother's generation. They were starting to reduce the size of their families.  Some still had ten children but some only had five.  So let's give her generation five kids each just to be conservative.  We're now up to 390,000 descendants from Great-great-Grandfather.  Of course some of these people died before bearing children, and some did not produce the obligatory 10.  So erring on the side of conservatism, let's bring that number down to 300,000.  What are the odds that somewhere in all that crowd we will uncover Doris's Dad?  Kind of scary.

Mom has decreed that this relationship is on hold until she can call a family meeting and sit down with all the family, her generation and above.  Together they will search and search and try to determine if somewhere in all that mess, Doris and Ebogo are related.  If they are, the wedding is off.  

Ebogo is heartbroken.  He's wild about our girl.  He's told all his friends about her.  Doris is frustrated. She's a very private person so has only told a handful of people.  But she has been steadily falling in love with this man of her dreams.  And Guy?  Guy's not sure what the Mother is trying to pull. It's flat out impossible to sort through that mob of people and come up with any kind of answer that will satisfy her.  What is her real motivation?  Is she truly concerned that the young couple not be distantly related?  Or does she not like something about Doris?  

Unless Guy has another idea, all we can do is wait and watch and pray.  All things are in God's hands and He does all things well.  The Mother says she will have an answer for them in two weeks time.

By the way, I've never been able to figure out what America's fascination with polygamy is all about.  We know scores and scores of polygamist marriages, and an equal number of adult children who grew up in the midst of this kind of mess.  We have never met anyone who is content and happy and fulfilled in their marriages.  We know endless stories of all the strife, and turmoil, and confusion that results. There is no happily ever after.  Think of the problems that are still traveling down through the generations because one man decided he needed 78 wives!  God's way is best.  Always and forever. 

Sunday, November 20, 2016

Last evening friends invited us to join them at a dinner show put on by the Junior Class at Rain Forrest International School.  RFIS is the mission high school that our youngest son, David attended 25 years ago.  

We had a great time.  Good food.  Good entertainment.  Good friends.  Laughed a lot.  English only spoken.  A large room full of white people.  Amazing!

We never go out and do stuff like this.  I mean like never, ever, ever.  Except when someone drags us out.  And on those rare times we always tell our selves "This was fun.  We don't do this kind of thing often enough."  

And then we slip right back into our very busy, very fulfilling ministry.  Mostly Africans.  Lots and lots of French.  Totally different culture.  And we love every minute of it.  

But it's good to escape into the Western culture once every great long while. 

 

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Bride Price.
Ever heard about it?
Buying a wife?
What's this??? 

Well, we've spent the last 25 years living in a country where paying the Bride Price is alive and well.  It works like this.  When a man finds a woman he would like to marry, he, along with a handful of his relatives, visit the girl's family.  They sit down together and discuss the fact that this man wants to marry that lady.  Important questions are asked.  If in the end, everyone is satisfied with this man, they agree to give their daughter (niece, granddaughter, sister, whatever) to him in marriage.  At the same time, they present him with a list of things they want for the Bride Price.  This list can contain anything from a new motorcycle, to a pair of shoes, to some African material, to a new cooking pot, to you name it.  Literally anything can be on that list.  And the monetary value can mount into the thousands (U.S. dollar equivalent that is). 

Now one could take issue with the bride price.  Call it selling daughters.  Declare it is just plain wrong.  Encourages couples living together without marriage.  (And one can make a very valid argument for that position.)

Or one could take the opposite position.  The Bride Price shows the value we put on our women.  And so on.

It's pretty hard to find a verse in the Bible to stand on.  There's no "Thou Shalt Not" or "Thou Shalt".  And over these last 25 years we've watched the Bride Price go though the upper stratosphere.  Couples are indeed living together without marriage in alarming numbers.  Things have gotten completely out of control.  

So the President recently stepped in and took control. The law now states that no Bride Price can be in excess of 150,000 F (around $300).  This price is attainable for any man, no matter who he is.  He goes to the extended family, and each one makes their contribution.  In no time at all he can raise 150,000 F.  It's an excellent law.  

But mankind being who he is, numerous families are rebelling.  They tell the man who wants to marry their daughter that it is the government who has put the limit on the Bride Price.  Here in their family, the Bride Price is some outrageous amount.  Like it or lump it.  As with anything, change comes slowly.
 

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

He asked if we could talk.  Needed help sorting out some things.  We went to the balcony, away from people, and sat down.  Seems friends have been telling him that he needs to become more outgoing.  Not so quiet and shy.  He should talk more.  And probably they're right.  After all, he feels God leading him into the pastorate.  Pastors have to be outgoing.  Could I help him?  Teach him how to be more talkative?  

Well, he came to the wrong person.  I don't happen to believe that all pastors must be outgoing.  I told him about my Daddy.  He wasn't a pastor per say, but he did a lot of teaching and preaching in the church.  Had a home Bible study for many years that lasted right up until he died at age 92.  Daddy was nothing if not a shy introvert.  But God used him in his shyness.  When he began teaching, he lost all shyness.  Was able to articulate the deep truths of the Word very well.  

I let him know that it was Creator God Who made him an introvert.  God loves him very much just the way he is.  And He is wonderfully able to use him in ministry as a quiet man.  By the time I was done waxing eloquent, his eyes were sparkling and his face was full of hope.  Maybe he could just be himself for the glory of God.  

We love our ministry out here in Darkest Africa.  Each day is different.  Never dull and boring.  Opportunities to minister to all sorts of people abound.  Life is full of adventure.

Saturday, November 12, 2016

She's in town right now.  Arrived late last night.  Came with the express purpose of sitting in her daughters home and watching what is really going on.  Wants to see it with her own eyes.  Figures a couple of days will be long enough to get a handle on the reality of this dreadful common law marriage.   

Knows all the "he said she said" stuff that's been going back and forth for years now.  Is fully aware that the father of her daughter's four children is a drunkard.  Knows he barely works, and what income he does make is spent immediately at the bar.  Comes home in the wee hours of the morning dead drunk and ready to fight.  Has been known to pick up a 2 X 4 and start beating on his so called wife.  All of this and much, much more she knows.  

But now, now she sees a glimmer of hope.  Maybe there is a chance for change.  Maybe she can find a way to help her daughter climb out of the mess she's been living in for so long.  And what makes the difference?  A couple of months ago her daughter gave her life to the Lord.  Cried out to Him for salvation.  Genuinely wants to begin walking in newness of life.  Started going to church.  Started reading her Bible.  Started praying.  Started being concerned about her situation.  

And so this dear, dear godly mother, who just happens to be my most treasured friend, is coming to help.  She hopes by the end of this brief visit that she will be armed with enough ammunition to really help her girl.  You see, with the tremendous amount of godly wisdom that she possesses, she does not assume that her daughter is the innocent victim.  She is convinced that if her adult daughter will begin to let God transform her into something beautiful for His Kingdom, this dreadful mess could improve.  If she would take responsibility for her stuff, confess it as sin, and let God take control, things will change.  

Long live godly mothers.  To God be the glory!

 

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

He left Shiloh convinced that he had blown it.  
We didn't like him.
He would be forbidden to pursue our girl. 
His life was over.
How would he ever be able to go on 
without this lovely lady who had invaded his life, 
his thoughts, 
his every waking moment?
Life couldn't get any worse than this.
 
He nervously phoned her.
It would be the last time.
No matter how deeply he had come to love her, 
he could not, 
he would not disrespect our wishes.

But what was this?  
She's reporting that we liked him?
We gave our consent to this relationship?
We were impressed with his walk with God?

Oh the wonders of life! 
He  was soaring in the clouds.
The birds were chirping.
The sun was shining.
Life could not get any better than this!

He reported to her that he had been very nervous.
coming to the home of whites.
He was overwhelmed with how kind we were.
How we treated our employees like family.
How they ate at the table with us.
How we interacted with them,
teased them,
obviously loved them.

And now, 
now,
oh the wonder if it,
now he too would be included in our family.
Slowly he would win our hearts 
and he would become one of us.
How wonderful the future will be! 
All praise to the Lord God Almighty.
Glory to His Name.
 

Saturday, November 5, 2016

He came.
We interrogated.
He was a bit nervous.
Not too much.
Just a bit.
He passed the test.
We ate.
We laughed.
He remained a bit nervous.
Gave good answers to our questions.
Doris kept catching my eye.
Trying to read my reaction to her guy.
Then he left.
The mother talked privately with each one.
And one by one we all said the same thing.
In the end, I gave the go ahead to Doris.
Her smile was wide.
She is in awe of God.
Who could have imagined two months ago that we would be here today.
We marvel at all that God is doing for our girl.

Friday, November 4, 2016

Tomorrow is the big day.  Doris is a mixture of nervousness and calm.  Tomorrow we will decide if "Mr. I'm Interested in Your Daughter" can move forward with his plans.  His future, their future, hangs in the balance.  

We are ready.  Shiloh is shinning.  The food is all planned out, purchased, and partially prepared.  We've discussed fully who will say what and what will happen next.  What are we looking for?  How will we know?  It's all pretty much culturally dictated.  A cookie cutter formula, really.  

It begins with her introducing this stranger to us.  Who is he and why is he here in our home?  Then he must tell us who his family is.  We listen carefully to hear if he descends from anyone who shows up in our girl's family tree.  After we've determined there are no taboos against a marriage, we let him know we are a strong Christian family.  Does he know our Lord?  We listen carefully to his testimony.  We tell him in no uncertain terms that we do not want to hear about them having sex before marriage.  No pregnancies.  No abortions.  For their sake, the standards are high for our daughter.  The questions will move on to his ability to support our girl.  Is he living by faith alone?  With his head in the clouds?  Or does he have adequate income to take care of her, even when she gets sick?  And where will they live?  And on and on it will go.  

We anticipate no more than two hours of interrogation, including eating together.  When he leaves Shiloh, he will not know if he has passed the test.  But if we are able, that is we all feel comfortable about this relationship,  I, as the mother, will be commissioned to talk privately with my daughter and let her know that she can move ahead with our blessing.  She will rush home and phone him with the good news.  If, however, we have misgivings, we will meet and discuss things until we all decide on our answer.  It may be early next week before she will know our decision.  

WOW!  Getting married Cameroonian style is not easy.  Daughters are not given away to any old guy that comes along asking to marry them.  This is serious business.  Much rides on the outcome.  Future generations will be impacted by this all important decision.   

We are trusting Almighty God to guide us in a clear way as we go through this important first meeting.

Tuesday, November 1, 2016

It happened this morning, on this the first day of November in the year of our Lord 2016.  He passed from death into life.  And now he's enjoying the fullness of life.  And our sorrow at his passing is mingled with joy.  Imagine what it must be like for him to be face to face with the One Who loves him so.

We've been friends for more than ten years.  We met through one of his numerous daughters.  We've been invited to his home many times.  Eaten many meals together.  Were included as part of the family for the wedding of his daughter, our friend.  Were there to join in the family celebration and joy later on when his youngest daughter got married.  Have visited one of his other daughters each time we've been back in the States.  This kindly gentleman of the old school was always so sweet to us.  We bumped into each other at U.S. Embassy functions.  He was one of the early employees of the Embassy.  Worked for them for more than thirty years.  And they kept right on inviting him back for the big events after he retired.  This dear man truly loved the Lord.  That's why we know beyond all doubt that he is at Home in glory now.  We can hardly wait to see him again, someday soon.

The family is arranging for a car to come and pick us up.  Hopefully that will be tomorrow.  We want to spend some time with them, participating in their great sorrow and loss.  In addition to sitting with the family in that home we know so well, we will be there whenever they bury our friend.  We want to show our last respect in every culturally appropriate way.  This quiet, humble man deserves nothing less.